What am I talking about? Let me explain. Usually I’m working on a Saturday but having got loads done in the week I’ve been enjoying a rare afternoon off.
So I decide to get the much-unused CBR600RR out of hibernation (there she is on the right tucked up in the garage).
I haven’t used it for about a month so thought the battery could do with a charge prior to winter. Kitted up, bike wheeled out and thumb the starter – nothing. The poor old Honda tries to fire, but can’t muster the energy.
So I have to hunt down the manual to find out where the battery is (yes, I know, I’m stupid) – it’s under the seat, so I try to take it off. One rounded bolt later, much cursing and a grazed knuckle and it comes off, I attach the jump pack and she fires up.
So, slightly delayed, I head off. Some 10 miles later I realise I need petrol, thinking the battery’s been topped up enough I pull in, fill her up and then try and start it again – yep, you guessed it… nothing!
Scanning the busy petrol station, I can’t believe my luck when I spot a recovery truck filling up in the corner. I wander over to see if the driver can help.
‘Excuse me, have you got any jump leads?’ I ask. All he does is hold up his hand – stange I think, then spot he’s got one of those ridiculous headsets on and is talking on his phone (this should have set the alarm bells ringing).
Two minutes later and I’m still stood there patiently waiting while he’s jabbering away. He finally hangs up. ‘Yes sir,’ he says (slightly weird). I ask again – ‘have you got any jump leads?’
‘No,’ he replies, ‘but I have got a jump pack.’ Brilliant!
‘But I can’t let you use it.’ Right…
‘Health and safety you see,’ he babbles. ‘Insurance won’t let me.’
‘Well, can you do it for me?’ I plead.
‘Nope… afraid not. Health and safety…’
What a tool.
Thankfully another motorist filling his car up overhears our conversation and shouts over. Turns out he’s a biker too and has got some jump leads in the back of his Toyota.
Few seconds later, I’ve fired the Honda up and was on my way home. So, thanks random motorist who helped, even offering me a lift home if it didn’t work – and to the ‘recovery’ truck driver – I hope you leave your lights on.
Bitter? Me? Certainly…