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Archive | Big Mike

Big Mike: Ian the gardener, and why you mustn’t judge a book by its cover

THEY say you should never judge a book by its cover – unless, of course, it’s a cookery book, or maybe one of those reserved for gentlemen and kept on the top shelf… Yet it’s something we’ve all been guilty of. And here’s why. A few years ago, when my gammy leg started to get [...]

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Big Mike: I’m going reliably retro after rust rears its head on modern models

THIS month, I’ve been suffering quite a bit with the brown stuff. Don’t worry, I’m not rushing off to the chemist every five minutes to buy myself some Imodium, only to then come back and tell you all about it, as that would be a little vile. But what I am perturbed by is something I thought [...]

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Big Mike: Dodgy Tony upsets my plan to make a fortune on ‘barn-find’ Golf

I HAVE a friend called Dodgy Tony. It’s unfair really, as he isn’t in the slightest bit dodgy. He just has that look about him…
 The reason I mention this is because Tony is a mechanic and one of those blokes who is extremely useful to know. Whatever fault you find on a car, no [...]

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Big Mike: Only first-time parents could ever think a cloth interior a good option

MY NEXT door neighbours have just become parents. A fact that, no doubt, you’ll find a little tedious as you probably don’t know them, and even if you did, probably wouldn’t be especially excited about, other than to wish them well and keep out of their way for a while until such a time as [...]

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Big Mike: Since when was a Rover worth more than a Merc?

IT’S a tale of two cars this month, and real proof of how the mighty have fallen. Both of the two cars in question arrived on my lot as part-exes last month and both were a little different from my normal trade-in stock but were nevertheless pretty easy to sell and worth taking on the [...]

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Big Mike: Since when was a Rover worth more than a Merc?

IT’S a tale of two cars this month, and real proof of how the mighty have fallen. Both of the two cars in question arrived on my lot as part-exes last month and both were a little different from my normal trade-in stock but were nevertheless pretty easy to sell and worth taking on the [...]

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Big Mike: It wasn’t a pleasure to see him and he won’t get any more favours

A GOOD businessman looks after his customers, or at least that’s what I’ve always been told. Indeed, it’s a model upon which I’ve built my business for the past 25 years. Look after people, be nice to them, and chances are they’ll come back and buy from you again next time they need a medium-to-long-term [...]

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Big Mike: My lie of 40 years ago became an expensive (but worthwhile) truth

NOTHING makes you feel your age more than having middle-aged children, so it was with a small amount of trepidation that the memsahib and I celebrated our eldest son’s 40th birthday at the weekend. We celebrated our ruby anniversary by doing the only thing possible to mark the occasion – by going out for a [...]

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Big Mike: Maxi’s mini problem leads to big embarrassment

I WAS down the Ship and Crown the other day with an old colleague of mine, testing the quality of the local Banks’s. As usual, the landlord wasn’t keeping it properly, but three pints in it started to flow a bit more smoothly – something I find is always the case… Of course, my drinking [...]

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Big Mike: I was so delighted to lose the sale that I ran to driver’s seat

In this line of work, you come across more than your fair share of idiots. It is one of the occupational hazards of being a retail transportation consultant, as my good lady wife has taken to introducing me at dinner parties. Idiots come in all shapes and sizes. Take the gentleman, for example (for want [...]

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